Hungarian author wants to know whether her YA fantasy novel is unique enough for readers?

My novel, Reign of the black flame, Book 1: The Waterglobe, is a YA fantasy trilogy, with completely new creatures, new realms, and a unique storyline inspired by Hungarian folklore!

About the story:

In an age when the mighty Forces of Nature rule, the eternal battle between Fire and Water flares into war. One human is chosen to regain the ancient equilibrium at any cost, but a dangerous love threatens to sabotage his mission.

I would really enjoy any feedback in these forums or directly to me, since I need to know if others can see what I am trying to say in my novels. I could provide a limited number of e-copies if you are interested in it.

thanks, B. B. Vayk


Journeyed there and back again
It gives me Avatar vibes (The Last Airbender, not the James Cameron one), and with only two sentences, it sounds YA only generously (a little more like the premise for an animated movie).

It could be an awesome story (and stories based on lesser known folklore are few and far between), and I guess the synopsis does tell you the basics if you're trying to hit only the checkpoints. But it doesn't give a sense of uniqueness. More like a FictionPress blurb. I feel like you need at least a paragraph to establish any sense of 'personality' in the story.
Amaryllis, thank you for your reply! To tell the truth, I wrote this story for myfelf - during the sleeping hours of my two little children. Then my husband read it (he is not a fantasy fan at all) and he liked it very much. He managed the whole publishing process in Hungary, and readers like it :) Now the story is translated and edited into English (I worked together with 2 great US editors and 2 proofreaders as I am not native English). And the e-book was published this February.
The storyline is based on Hungarian folklore, creating an opportunity for western readers to experience the battle of good and evil in an entirely new way. The characters are uncommon to those found in western European or north American works, being completely new creatures in a fantasy world that spans many unknown realms. These characters are my own creations.

Would you be interested in reading my novel?

Its brief synopsis:

In an age when the mighty Forces of Nature walk the earth, the eternal battle of Fire and Water flares into war. The evil Fire, fueled by ancient jealousies and a lust for power, commits the ultimate treachery - the theft of the Waterglobe. Equilibrium between the Forces is lost, leaving a drought-plagued world that only one brave human can restore. Robert Ground, longing for adventure, lives in a peaceful, sleepy little village. One day, Fire appears, laying to waste everything Robert has ever known. Determined to find out why he has become a target of the Prime Evil, Robert begins a journey to uncover his family’s secrets, and soon discovers a link between his past and the elemental battle waging around him. Robert is joined by the lovely, secretive Marian as they forge an unlikely partnership. Unknown to Robert, Marian is a fireling, and Fire’s cruelest, most loyal apprentice. As Marian pursues her own dark mission, two others join the travelers: Gider, the vicious, coarse, fermad, and Shine, the brave and noble rainsteed.
Reaching the Cloud Realm, Robert is tasked with an impossible mission, one that will test him beyond the limits of his endurance. The four adventurers navigate the perilous realms of the Forces, gathering powerful weapons for the final battle with Fire. Each is forever altered, as they must choose between self-sacrifice and treachery. Ultimately, Robert faces Fire and finally learns why he is destined to fight the ultimate evil.

thanks for your reply again :)


Jonathan Bowerman

Hung out on a briar with Honorable Jorg

I know I am coming to this late in the game, but your synopsis caught my attention. It looks like you've been on amazon for a while; that's great! I hope it is going well. I am going to look into getting your book!

Take care,